Hiding Addiction Behind Depression | The Fix

Hiding Addiction Behind DepressionBy Temma Ehrenfeld 03/03/16Alcoholism cost him his life, after professionals said my partner was just depressed.ShutterstockEveryone in the psychology field knows that it’s common to be depressed and alcoholic. My partner (call him Mark) took antidepressants, confided in me and others, and none of it helped. Still, for years, neither our couples therapist nor either of his two psychiatrists, or any of our friends labeled him an “alcoholic.” The real problem was depression, even after he died in a binge at 55.To me, his death is a tale of medical professionals failing. Maybe I’m the innocent one and there is a shadow story I don’t know—help they offered and he rebuffed. But my guess is that they all just circled around his scary problem. When I met Mark, he drank a bottle or two of wine every Saturday night. We lived in New York City and didn’t need to drive. I also didn’t know drinkers. I left my one glass half-full and he’d finish it off for me.We were so very much in love.He was the funniest man I’d ever met, and the sweetest.Six years later, we still read poetry and talked for hours every weekend. But we didn’t live together and I didn’t want to marry him—yet. I wanted him to be stronger, able to knock off a list of problems. Every so often, he’d decide to “cut out the wine,” and he’d drink less for a few months. Then he was drinking more, slipping at work and staying in bed until noon on Sunday mornings. I’d ask, “Are you hungover?” He’d say, “I’m depressed. Work.”

Source: Hiding Addiction Behind Depression | The Fix

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