Sponsor vs Therapist

12 Ways to Tell the Difference Between Your Sponsor and Your Therapist:1. Your sponsor isn’t all that interested in the “reasons” you drank. 2. Your therapist thinks your root problem is your lack of self-esteem and your negative self-image. Your sponsor thinks your problem is yourself. 3. Your therapist wants to pamper your inner child. Your sponsor thinks it should be spanked. 4. Your sponsor thinks your inventory should be about you, not your parents. 5. Speaking of your parents, your sponsor tells you not to confront them, but to make amends to them. 6. The only time your sponsor uses the word “closure” is before the word “mouth.” 7. Your sponsor thinks “boundaries” are things you need to take down, not build up. 8. Your therapist wants you to love yourself first; your sponsor wants you to love others first. 9. Your therapist prescribes care-taking medication. Your sponsor prescribes prayer making and meditation. 10. Your sponsor thinks “anger management skills” are numbered 1 through 12. 11. Now that you haven’t had a drink in 6 months, your therapist thinks you should make a list of all your goals and objectives for the next 5 years, starting with finishing up that college degree. Your sponsor thinks you should start today by cleaning coffee pots and help to carry a heavy box of literature to the jail. 12. Your sponsor will not lose his/her license if he/she talks about God.

Source: Sponser vs Therapist


AA Big Book — Chapter 5

The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success. On that basis we are almost always in collision with something or somebody, even though our motives are good. Most people try to live by self-propulsion. Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show; is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way. If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased. Life would be wonderful. In trying to make these arrangements our actor may sometimes be quite virtuous. He may be kind, considerate, patient, generous; even modest and self-sacrificing. On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest. But, as with most humans, he is more likely to have varied traits.What usually happens? The show doesn’t come off very well. He begins to think life doesn’t treat him right. He decides to exert himself more. He becomes, on the next occasion, still more demanding or gracious, as the case may be. Still the play does not suit him. Admitting he may be somewhat at fault, he is sure that other people are more to blame. He becomes angry, indignant, self-pitying. What is his basic trouble? Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be kind? Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well? Is it not evident to all the rest of the players that these are the things he wants? And do not his actions make each of them wish to retaliate, snatching all they can get out of the show? Is he not, even in his best moments, a producer of confusion rather than harmony?Our actor is self-centered, ego-centric, as people like to call it nowadays. He is like the retired business man who lolls in the Florida sunshine in the winter complaining of the sad state of the nation; the minister who sighs over the sins of the twentieth century; politicians and reformers who are sure all would be Utopia if the rest of the world would only behave; the outlaw safe cracker who thinks society has wronged him; and the alcoholic who has lost all and is locked up. Whatever our protestations, are not most of us concerned with ourselves, our resentments, or our self-pity?Selfishness, self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn’t think so. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kill us! God makes that possible. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid. Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to. Neither could we reduce our self-centeredness much by wishing or trying on our own power. We had to have God’s help.

Source: AA Big Book — Chapter 5

A.A. Chapter 3, AA More About Alcoholism

MOST OF us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.

We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.

We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals-usually brief-were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better.

We are like men who have lost their legs; they never grow new ones. Neither does there appear to be any kind of treatment which will make alcoholics of our kind like other men. We have tried every imaginable remedy. In some instances there has been brief recovery, followed always by a still worse relapse. Physicians who are familiar with alcoholism agree there is no such thing as making a normal drinker out of an alcoholic. Science may one day accomplish this, but it hasn’t done so yet.

Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe they are in that class. By every form of self-deception and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic. If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right- about-face and drink like a gentleman, our hats are off to him. Heaven knows, we have tried hard enough and long enough to drink like other people!

Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums-we could increase the list ad infinitum.

~From the book, Alcoholics Anonymous — Chapter 3, pages 30-31

“Some of you are thinking: “Yes, what you tell us is true, but it doesn’t fully apply. We admit we have some of these symptoms, but we have not gone to the extremes you fellows did, nor are we likely to, for we understand ourselves so well after what you have told us that such things cannot happen again. We have not lost everything in life through drinking and we certainly do not intend to. Thanks for the information.”

That may be true of certain nonalcoholic people who, though drinking foolishly and heavily at the present time, are able to stop or moderate, because their brains and bodies have not been damaged as ours were. But the actual or potential alcoholic, with hardly an exception, will be absolutely unable to stop drinking on the basis of self-knowledge. This is a point we wish to emphasize and re-emphasize, to smash home upon our alcoholic readers as it has been revealed to us out of bitter experience.” ~pages 38-39, Alcoholics Anonymous.

About A.A. Chapter 3, More About Alcoholism

Source: A.A. Chapter 3, AA More About Alcoholism

staying clean one day at a time in australia


i am the village crazy lady. that's my job. an elderwoman on the north coast of new south wales australia.

the SilverBird10

recovery with wrinkles I am the village crazy lady thats my job

Pauls Pages Too

Extra Content from PaulsPages.com

the SilverBird9



an elderwoman's images of 2017 AND 2018 in australia

Welcome to Jeremy Jaramillo's Blog

Fighting Ignorance since 1975 (It’s taking longer than I thought) and Smile, because everyone is entitled to my opinion!


recovery with wrinkles

Narconon Fresh Start

Past The Tipping Point

Addiction Prescription


Thought Catalog

Thought Catalog is a digital youth culture magazine dedicated to your stories and ideas.

Sunflower Effect

Amber K. Mersing Foundation


Dislocated ElderWoman . living the life of a run down old hermitage. simple poor and quiet

Little Fears

Tales of whimsy, humor and courgettes

the SilverBird6

staying clean with wrinkles

Memories are made of this

I need photos to keep my memories alive

Heritage Railways NSW Projects

Proposals to save various decaying NSW rail heritage icons and stations for the future

The SilverBird5

staying clean with wrinkles

%d bloggers like this: